Well, here I am...
Twenty-four years old and still a year away from getting my undergraduate degree. Of course this isn't exactly where I saw myself back in 2007 when I graduated high school, but a weird thing has happened lately. Before I go into that let me digress for a second back to seventeen year old me. The thing I loved the most about high school were my TV Production classes. I can say that without a doubt in my mind. My entire day could have been in the gutter but, and sorry to be cheesy, I came alive when I walked into that classroom. Now it could have been a grumpy, teenage angst alive... but I was alive. Needless to say when it came time during my senior year to choose a path for further education, I looked into film programs everywhere. And there laid my problem; these programs were EVERYWHERE.
In my mind I struck out the University of Alabama almost immediately because I foolishly thought that there was no way possible that a film program in Tuscaloosa, Alabama could help me in any way. That being said, the closest programs that I was interested in were in Savannah and Atlanta, Georgia. Roughly 450 and 203 miles away respectively, and the idea of being that far from my family absolutely terrified me. It actually scared me so bad that I convinced myself that I didn't want to go into film and did what just about everyone I knew did, enrolled at Shelton State Community College.
Ah Shelton State; what everyone who is from Tuscaloosa refers to as the 13th grade. One building, familiar faces. What else could you ask for? I was in college and I couldn't believe it. I couldn't believe it so much that I stayed at a two year community college for just under four years. Whoops. During my extended time there I tried to find the career path that I wanted. My first choice was radiology. Then came physical therapy, followed by athletic training, back to physical therapy, and finally full circle back to radiology. I grew up and snapped into reality somewhere around year two, when I should have been moving on from Shelton to a four year university, and realized that I needed to get things together. I applied for the radiology tech program at DCH only to be rejected. Twice. But that was okay for me (after a few good cries of course) because my two observation visits solidified that a radiologist wasn't what I really wanted to be. So I applied for an Associates in Science degree, finished up a few final classes, and got out of Shelton for good.
I was back in the same place that I was when I was seventeen, asking myself again what I wanted to do with my life. After being rejected from the radiology tech program I decided to take a year off while I decided. I'll admit that I didn't start looking into colleges right away... I took some down time. In the meantime I started opening at the gym that I work at, 4:30am comes quick you guys, and eventually looking up information off and on. I found myself coming back to the same thing over and over again; film. A total loop back to high school senior year.
Naturally I didn't think that my parents would go for this idea so I kept downplaying it in my head. After a month of actually researching and still no idea what to do I decided to ask my cousin Christie (shoutout: Hay girl!) for her opinion, she knows me better than I do sometimes. I won't go into extreme detail but what I took from her opinion was "Do what makes you happy. No matter what." So I took the terrifying leap of faith and told my parents that I wanted to spend thousands of dollars on a degree in film. They didn't get it, but they were behind my choice 100%. I was so relieved. I guess now I should take the time to say that I had done more research on UA's Telecommunication and Film department and it was actually impressive. They had grads working for
Tosh.0, Tyler Perry Studios, and AMC's
The Walking Dead just to name a few
. I wanted in. And that's when I realized that I was about to turn twenty-four years old and was STILL two years away from an undergraduate degree. But I went with it. My parents gave me exactly two years to get my degree and I had my first class that summer.
Now, as I
FINALLY begin my senior year at the University of Alabama I've started noticing that weird thing that I mentioned at the beginning of this blog; I'm actually happy and I
like going to class. Anyone that knows me personally may think differently because of how much I complain about having to go to class on the reg, but deep down (or maybe even not so deep down) I really enjoy it. And that is exactly what I have been looking for. Most things that I've studied so far have come so naturally for me and I've had incredible opportunities at UA -- I worked with Tom Cherones and Thom Azzari who were the Director and Production Designer for
Seinfeld this past semester on a production class. I can't even begin to tell you guys how awesome that was. I finally found my passion and I couldn't/can't wait to get life started after graduation.
{insert cheesy quote here}
I really hope that this quote is true. I've done a lot of working for things that I don't love in my life and it's always felt like just that; work.
Okay I wrote this small novel about my struggle with higher education not to get pity for my young stupidity, but for two reasons. The first wasn't intentional but it's important; this has been kind of a therapy session for me. So if I've bored your eyeballs out, I apologize. The second is to simply tell anyone who cares that if you haven't found your passion, don't give up. Mine has been dangling in front of my face since I took my first production class at fifteen and it took me nearly ten years to wake up and realize it. My advice would be to talk to those who know you the most. Ask them what they notice you talk about a lot, or what career they could see you in. Seems dumb but I promise you, those small questions will tell you so much about yourself and their answers will probably mean more to you than any counselor you could talk to.
So get out there and chase your dreams. And here's to hoping they don't stay dreams, that we can turn them into a reality and never have to "work" a day in our lives.
